Everything Must Go: Doomsday Clearance Sale!

4

December 18, 2012 by meximo70



 

Tick Tock, neighborinos!

doomsdaycouple

Only a few days left until the end of it all! until planet Niburu X collides with the galactically aligned earth and plummets our magnetic poles into chaos as we’re melted by solar flares and feasted on by our zombified neighbors!!

shotgunshellswe must keep an opportunist state of mind! in doing so, i have rummaged up some of my left over supplies i had from the Y2K scare. I have 18 bottles of water left, 2 kerosene heaters, 4 barrels of kerosene, a generator, 87 cans of french cut green beans, 56 boxes of instant mashed potatoes, 32 boxes of mac and cheese, 76 cans of various cambells soup, more beef jerky than you can snap into, and 342 rounds of ammo for a 12 gauge.

bottledwateri’m selling each for $25 a peice or $10,000 for all of it!

i know, my doomsday prepping friends, why would i sell such a survivalists goldmine this close to armageddon??

because: SETI scientists have proven that there is no planet Niburu or planet X hurtling towards earth.

NASA scientists have proven that there is no galactic alignment. Astronomers said the only alignment that happens is the sun with the center of the galaxy which happens every year.

Geologists have proven that our magnetic poles are not going to go through some drastic change that will hurtle the earth towards the sun.

Archeologists have proven that the Mayans did not predict the end of the world. the Mayan calendar is cyclic, 2012 just ends one cycle.

The CDC has proven that a flesh eating zombie horde will not take over the earth. zombies, however, are possible, if you’ve ever watched the youth of today stare at their phones, ipads, laptops, game consoles.

Scientists also have proven that solar flares are predicted to be less powerful next year. If they did effect the earth, it would take out a few satelites…not turn us to ash.

But eventhough, this proof is set before you…you’re going to prep anyways..and call me foolish…so how about it? i take cash or check.

Advertisements

4 thoughts on “Everything Must Go: Doomsday Clearance Sale!

  1. Jack Flacco says:

    Well, the Zombie Apocalypse sounds credible to me, so I’ll need a bit more convincing to believe otherwise. Other than that, if you do end up selling all your doomsday stock, let me know, I have a bridge that’s for sale that may come in handy when the military decides to cut the island off for fear the infection will spread.

    • meximo70 says:

      Right after i read this comment, the Discovery Channel had on a special called “2012 the Zombie Apocalypse” and went over the possiblity of a “mad cow”-like virus getting loose from a government testing facility located in Manhattan, KS and how this could bring about a zombie-like plague. as if i wasn’t paranoid enough…haha.

  2. So we’re good on Friday? OK, thanks

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

back in da day

Categories

Meta Leta High, Meta Hiney Ho!

HotDish Hell Hath Frozen Over

Days Till SummerJune 21st, 2013
Ahhhhh...warming warmth of warming

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 20 other followers

Attila Ovari

Loving Life and Inspiring Others

HarsH ReaLiTy

A Good Blog is Hard to Find

Paper Engines

Cultural Critique, Art and The Musings of a Moral Mad Scientist

Sidney Fussell

Portfolio of my Op-eds on race, politics, economies of attention, tech and gaming, destigmatizing mental illness, culture. My publications include: Paste, The Guardian, Ebony, Boing Boing, Wordpress: Freshly Pressed Blog, Huffington Post: Black Voices, The Arkansas Times, Salon, Medium Difficulty, Media Diversified, The Feminist Wire, Venturebeat, Gamasutra, Clutch Online, Gamers Against Bigotry, Borderhouse Blog, Culture Mass, SquareGo, Pixels Or Death

ARMAND ROSAMILIA

Official Site for Author Armand Rosamilia

The Jenny Mac Book Blog

Jenny Mac and the Man of Secrets

TIPPR Blog

A blog of original content and reviews

Bucket List Publications

Indulge- Travel, Adventure, & New Experiences

moviejoltz

The website where movies count

RikReimert

Drawings

Break Room Stories

Service Industry Stories and More Since 2012

Me. Designer. Entrepreneur.

life as I see it...

photographybycalliec

I love Australia, travel & photography

REVEAL ILLUSIONS a site by Elin Borg.

But really, everything is nothing.

Harley Manifold

Harley Manifold Fine Art

Joe Jeeber

My life and anything I find cool on teh INTERNET!

Cast Light

In the moment, everyday

Moths to a Flame

A collection of mis-adventures

%d bloggers like this: